This is a previous post from my old blog….I’ve been thinking about it a lot and felt like I should add it and its part 2 here!
I have been finding my heart saying over and over, “I’m so in love with_______.” Often the blank is filled with the name of a person. Many times a person I didn’t expect to fill that space. I am sometimes shocked….I stand back and wonder where the thought came from.
Haven’t I been praying for love? That the Spirit of God would fill my heart and shift the way I think…the way I ‘hear’ the world around me and so he is…just not the way I thought….as always, the hand that guides me looks nothing like I thought it would.
Moved to tears by the strength of a dear one bringing life into this world. Her courage blows me away and it is an honor to call her friend. “I’m so in love with _____!”
Surprised by the love and kindness in the words of a young man who fights for his faith and to be honest in ways I can’t imagine. “I’m so in love with _____!”
The visit with an old friend I haven’t seen in years brought to town because of deep, deep heartache…years that have passed and a grown man stands before me. “I’m so in love with____!”
Spring melt that bring bird songs and muddy driveways….free range chickens pecking the ground and fresh air. “I’m so in love with spring!”
Words that bruise and break miraculously also heal and prepair the ground of my heart for new life. “I’m so in love with this process!”
The humility, and love that exudes from the man I married. The willingness to admit mistakes and choose to be ‘for each other and this marriage.’ “I am so in love with my husband!”
Little fingers and curious minds, always learning, always asking, always doing. “I am so in love with my children!”
I fight so hard to do it all ‘right’ only to see the utter failure in the end. Thinking too highly of my own ways and looking back at a path that has taken me far from my goals….far from my loves…the knowing…deep down that it can be changed, forgiven and reset. “I’m so in love with Jesus!”
The honesty of a new friend, an almost stranger as she takes up the banner of truth and calls life like she sees it bumps and all. A deep knowing that we are alike in ways I’ve prayed so long for. “I’m so in love with ____!”
One who knew me young, but not as I changed….he is grown now with a family of his own. The weight of his load has brought him purpose. Oh the pride I have in him as he stands tall after a day of hard work and smiles that same smile I knew as a child. Full of mischief and wonder! “I am so in love with___!”
They speak hard words…drenched in honesty….ask the questions that need to be asked…there is love in their eyes even when it hurts…they hold hope and truth and invite me in….messy parts included. “I am so in love with these women!”
These love moments are like snap shots I don’t expect….my heart flows over and there they are….deep and real. A practice of entering into truth in the moment. It is changing my world and blowing me away.
The things I Love, Love, Love….again (post 2)
How could I not revisit this post? The things I’m in love with just keep rolling into view!
The joy of twins opening gifts…they turned 4. The kindness of family who remember and miss them! Gigi and Papa sending fun kid cards! That little blond cousin who loves dress up and pretend! “I’m so in love with this family!”
The squeals that can only mean one thing…bunnies! A new batch of kits right on top of the last! That poor mama! She gives and cares. Her weight is down but those bunnies are healthy and growing! “I’m so in love with new life and how The Lord sustains it!”
Little green shoots! It’s May! “I am so in love with green, growing things!”
Growing, growing, growing…the green blades of barley grass and the twisted root mats that feed our animals. “I am so in love with learning this process of caring for our animals in a healthy way!”
And then there are the people dear and true…those who meet us in the every day scruff! We clean and sort…we laugh and cry…we sing and bake…we learn and we teach…we get covered in mud and wonder why we have chosen to live ‘like this’ and then we remember…this is life and it is love and it is whole and healing even when it is hard. And, as we work we enter into the real. We reach out and one hand meets another and arms embrace. “Oh, I am so in love with these people.”
Words deep and true holding layers of meaning that only time can pull back and reveal. Thank you friend. “I’m so I love with you.”
The voices are different…sometimes loud and at others only a whisper. Often, views are stated harshly. You don’t look like me.
You don’t live like me.
You don’t sound like me.
Always, it seems, There is a deep yearning to be heard….payed attention to…seen!
I see you.
I hear you.
That hurt…I know know it too…I’ve lived here for some time now.
“And yes, I’m so in love with you too.”